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Being Superwoman

Being Superwoman

Category Archives: Family

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Living Your Potential

26 Sunday Jan 2020

It’s an interesting phenomenon that we can see the potential in others more clearly than they can see in themselves.  And the same goes with how difficult it is to see our own potential and a clear path to our goals and ambitions.

I’ve learned that I’m not going to change this, even though it doesn’t make any sense to my rational brain. But I trust that the Universe has a reason for making it easier to see the potential in others than it is to see it in ourselves.

Therefore the only option is to embrace the challenge and succeed anyway!

there is no man living

Here is what I’m learning about how people are achieving greater levels of success and reaching a higher level of potential.

Set a long term plan

A wise man and mentor referred me to an inspiring and famous quote which says that  we tend to overestimate what we can do in one year but underestimate what we can accomplish in 5, 10 or 20 years. I’ll provide the Bill Gates quote since he’s a tech icon I admire.

“Most people overestimate what they can do in one year and underestimate what they can do in ten years.”

For the first time I created a 5 year plan versus my typical “one year resolution” list of 47 items that I wanted to accomplish in 12 months. It’s already made a huge difference in the way I approach life and has reduced my stress level tremendously.  Last year at this time I would have been freaking out and I would be telling myself — “it’s practically February – one month has almost vanished before my eyes!! — I am no where near accomplishing my long list of goals.”  For more reading on this check out Founderpedia post.

But .. because I have a five-year plan, I’m not freaking out at all. I’ve already accomplished a few things and if I take the long view, then I’m well on my way and feel confident that success is in my future.  Which leads me to …

Celebrate the small wins

We achieve lots of things on a daily basis, but because we’re so focused on accomplishing something big, we erroneously skip over the confidence boost and validation by not celebrating our achievements. Each win doesn’t require a grand stand and parade, but even a short discussion with yourself saying “I did that!” or “What a wonderful accomplishment towards my bigger goal” will increase your mood and give you energy as you tackle the rest of the day, year, decade.

Give. And then give more 

I’m consistently receiving signs these days that in order to increase our happiness and to help us be successful, we need to give. And it’s critical to give when we feel down and least feel like we can, or have, the capacity to give.

Giving doesn’t have to be monetary. It could be as simple as a compliment. And even if you’re a giver … you will be surprised how giving more will unlock the inspiration needed to tackle what seems like an insurmountable task.

Research reported in Adam Grant’s book “Give and Take” (which I highly recommend) shows that giving in chunks (ie: focused giving in a short period of time) versus giving in sprinkles (ie: one small act a day for a week), provides greater satisfaction and a feeling of happiness. And when we are happy, we know that we tend to be more motivated and therefore have a greater chance of working towards our goals and true potential.

Unlock-Your-Potential

Finding happiness 

Happiness isn’t always derived from the work we do or even the goals we’re trying to accomplish. Often finding happiness elsewhere (in an activity we enjoy; spending time with people that inspire us; volunteering with something you care about) can provide you with the happiness that will give you the motivation and push you to dig deeper and reach higher so you can truly unlock your potential.

… and on a personal note, just writing this blog today is a huge win for me that I’m going to celebrate with a delicious Chai Latte and a mini “woot woot” as I hit “publish”. 🙂

Possible

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko | Filed under Family, Inspiration, Life's Lessons, LifePlanning

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Community

23 Wednesday Oct 2019

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in community, Family, Inspiration, Life's Lessons

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The other day I heard an important distinction between the meaning of community and the definition of a network.

community-services

A network is a group of interconnected people … which I completely relate to because I have personally built a business by building my network.

A community is a feeling of fellowship of others, as a result of sharing common attitudes, interests and goals.

The distinction between the two got me thinking about what community is … and the community that I have fostered … versus the networks I have built.

And then it dawned on me.  The reason why I have been experiencing a sense of loss and loneliness in my life. It is because I haven’t nurtured enough community, at a time when I think I needed it the most.

There are things we do that help foster community.

Being in a relationship … having a family … a partnership of some kind …

These all lend themselves to shared interests and common goals.

When we have a belief in something, or a strong passion, be it a spiritual belief in God or some passion for say a certain sport or the arts and culture, we have an easier time building connection.  We form relationships where we rely on others and over time, feel confident that no matter what, we are going to be there for each other … be it to pray with … cheer with … create with … or commiserate with.

Community_3

Being a solo entrepreneur can make it difficult to build or keep up within a community. We focus most of our time on our company.  We make decisions to prioritize growing the business over, sometimes, almost everything else.  And we can often seclude ourselves from places of deep connectivity citing a lack of time, energy or a whole host of other reasons, valid or not.

But the cost of disconnection can be great.

It’s almost like we find our own little hole and keep digging ourselves towards the opposite direction of community and support, even though I think we realize it’s exactly what we need to thrive.  We need community and that sense of support to keep our heart and soul alive – so it can fuel our imagination, our passions, and yes, ultimately our business.

We all have a lot to offer to a community, in addition to what we will gain from being a part of one.  But like anything else in life, it starts with taking a step forward in the direction we want to go.  And we don’t know what might stick, so we can’t be scared to go down a few paths to find the right one for us.

Be it for a season, a reason, or a lifetime.  Finding a community, or two or five, feels like a good use of our time.

community-word cloud.jpg

 

Special thanks to my new community #MC and my old #creativeNZ match for the inspiration.

Can I have a minute?

19 Tuesday Jun 2018

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Business, Family, Health & Exercise, Life's Lessons, stress, Uncategorized

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I know I’m preaching to the choir when I say …

Dear Universe,

Could I just have a minute?

And I probably won’t get much argument that Life  … is … well … really hard some days! And it often feels like ‘some days’ turns into ‘most days’.

Regardless of what we’re going through, it feels like it’s the biggest thing in the world. Because … it is — at least it is for us, in that moment.

Sitting on the opposite side of the conversation we can smile and say a kind thing — give unwavering encouragement — and really believe that it’s going to work out for the person.  But —- have them turn around and say that our world is equally going to turn out OK .. well, that’s a little harder to believe.

And that’s when I want to scream out to the Universe …

Could. I. Just. Have. A. Minute.

A minute to collect my thoughts …

A minute to feel like it’s not an uphill climb …

A minute to feel sunshine on my face without a care in the world …

A minute to reach into my soul and find that ounce of hope and belief that will carry me through the next valley …

A minute to breathe without the pressure of being busy, striving, achieving, accomplishing  …

Just. A. Minute ….

… where the Universe stops with me. Gives me a little nod. Cracks a smile. And makes the most vulnerable version of myself believe — yes, it is going to be okay.

Because then … it feels just a little easier to go back to my world of beautiful chaos — back to the high bar and expectations I set for myself — back to the work stress that I, for some reason, crave — and back to the family concerns that make me realize that my own mortality deserves more respect.

#DeepBreathe #Grateful #AlwaysLearning #RelentlessForwardMotion

 

 

What I Wouldn’t Do …

27 Friday Feb 2015

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Family, Love

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Have you ever said … “what I wouldn’t do for … or to have … or to experience …” ?

Yeah, well, thankfully, we all have.

And I say “thankfully” because while I don’t know about you, for me … it makes me feel human. Because we all have flaws, as well as “features”, and it’s only natural to sometimes want more.

There is no doubt that we all take simple things for granted … And we’ve accomplished so much that we now live a “really busy” life to enjoy the simple yet amazing pleasures around us… Yet, we all realize (at some point) that “what we wouldn’t do for” is often not what matters at all.

Because when all is said and done — at the beginning and the end of the day —sometimes just taking a moment to remember the gifts that are in our lives (our “very” busy lives no doubt); regardless how we make it through the day … with whatever support or encouragement or challenges, when you place your head on the pillow and fall asleep, with love in your heart and faith in your soul, maybe it wasn’t such a bad day after all.

Maybe, you wouldn’t do anything different at all … and all that you have, is exactly what you need.

#12yoGirlsAreAmazing

Saturday Mornings

20 Saturday Dec 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Family, Health & Exercise

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Tags

Christmas, friends, running, saturday mornings, sleeping in, trails, utah

good_morning_wallpapers_free_download_good_morning_wishes_and_quotes_for_happy_morning_wallpapers

 

It’s 0830 and I have yet to get out of bed. Call it lazy. Call it boring. Call it un-productive, but today I call it perfect.

For the better part of nine months this year I woke up on the weekends with one of my most favorite things planned … to go for a run. I had to start from scratch last year as I was coming off an injury that turned into a surgery that got complicated by a great distraction … so it wasn’t always an early morning and a long run, but it was always the focus.

And then the training runs did get long … and the desire and need for new trails came up … and those were even a further drive away … which meant that sometimes me and my (amazing!!!) running gals would head out for 18 miles and oops, get lost and then run 24! Friends and family were very patient when we left by 0630 and got home in the very late afternoon. And then, yep, of course we’d all get up Sunday and go for another run (albeit not quite as far).

In the final two months of my training I was out of the door by zero dark hundred … running in the double digits … and enjoying the beautiful trails for hours. Sometimes with friends. Sometimes on my own. Often I would run with one or two for 10-ish miles and then someone else would join or replace the others so that I could get my long runs done without too much time on my own. My running friends are beyond awesome.

So today …. No long run. Actually, probably no run at all. Just the day in front of me for however I choose. And right now, as I type this post … I’m loving what is in front of me … a smile from spending two days with a new friend and enjoying a precious little girl … knowing my mom is home from her hospital visit and on her road to recovery … the thought of making perogies with my sister when I am home next week for the holidays (I’m certain to impress a boy with home-made perogies, right!?!) … and thinking about the canvas I’ll paint for my life in 2015 … I’ve never been to Utah. Perhaps it should make the list this year. I hear there is lots to do in Utah and I bet they have a few trails I would enjoy.

#TimeToGetUp!

The Footsteps of Superwoman

09 Saturday Aug 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Family, Life's Lessons, Love

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blog, desperation, divorce, exploring, friends, happiness, inspiration, joy, marriage, mom, parent, running, step-daughter, step-mom, step-parent, struggles, superwoman, writing

When I came up with the title of this blog it was because at the time, I was playing the role of step-mom to a beautiful 10 year old girl, and it was the first time in my life that I got to experience being a parent. I quickly discovered a huge appreciation for every parent on the planet and especially those that were doing it alone. I was amazed how important it became for me to drop my work and ensure this girl learned her multiplication, completed her homework, adapted to the nuances of living here, and at the same time, met some new friends and started to experience all the beauty that surrounded us. While it wasn’t easy, because I’m pretty good at being a workaholic, there wasn’t ever any contest — without asking, the girl and her needs always won over (and happily so).

I kept the name of the blog even though by the time I starting writing, my circumstances had changed and (sadly for some reasons, and happily for others) I was faced with simply taking care of me again. With a little time I have learned that there is also something heroic about waking up and trying to figure out what I want. Did you know that it’s actually easier to wake up when you know the routine so perfectly, when you don’t have time to think? Simply wake the girl, prepare the lunch, make sure the girl gets up, do the first email check-in, ensure the homework’s packed, remind the girl we’re late, drive to school, be the friendly parent and say hello to the other busy moms and dads, hurry home, begin the day. With the absence of that purpose, it’s been WAY harder each morning — because now the purpose is me — and it has been a very long while since anyone took care of that girl.

“They say” the leading cause of divorce these days is marriage. Although I don’t know why, I do believe the statistic. 🙂 Something just seems to change when marriage is involved. Kids can play a big role, but even without children, many men and women loose themselves and struggle desperately to find their way back.

And then once we do separate and think, oh thank God I’m free from “that!”, we struggle to know who we are and what we want — and we spend oodles amounts of time and energy pushing away anything that looks remotely close to what we had in our past.

Right now I want to have it all. I want to be all of my many personalities and be all the ways that my heart tells me to be when I’m quiet enough to listen to it. I don’t want a box – certainly not the one that I’ve had before … but I do want some of the pieces that were in the box. Is it possible?  Of course it is … but it takes courage and relentless forward motion. Let’s hope I have both.

Because today I saw that little girl that inspired me to name this blog (amongst many other things that I’m sure will be the subject of future writings), and for those few hours, I was reminded what a real superwoman looks like. And that piece exists within me — that I know for sure, and it brings me joy when I think about it and her.  And I don’t want it to go away.

Tomorrow I get to be runner girl and wake up at 5:30 am to share a beautiful and challenging trail with some women I’m lucky to call my friends. I’ve desperately missed that, and them, and I always want to have this as my number one choice for a Saturday morning.

And then tomorrow night I’ll be just a girl out on the town with my best friend. I’ll wash the hours of sweat from my face and dirt from my toes and wear high heels or boots (cause it is San Francisco in the summer after all) and no one will know by looking at me the other sides that exist or that I started my day in a pair of trail shoes.

And the best part will be Sunday, when I get to be explorer girl and do something new with someone I am excited to get to know. Even though he’s only ready to see a few sides of me — that’s okay. We are all on our own path and the only thing important is to enjoy the path that we are on in that one moment.

Why can’t we be all of THAT in a marriage?

And if I thought I was on the wrong track, then the text from Alaska out of the blue as I started to write this blog, reminded me that I am not.

“and btw: your inner superwoman is right in front of you — there are a few occasions where she’s following YOUR footsteps”.

Wow. How can I not celebrate all of those pieces that make up the reason why I started this blog in the first place.

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Helping with the school book report … Priceless.

Why Divorce Sucks

24 Thursday Apr 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Family, Life's Lessons

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alimony, attorney, custody battle, divorce, fair, greed, kids, marriage, money, what is right

I hope that this blog post doesn’t apply to you.

Recently I’ve met a few people that are divorced, or going through the divorce process, and are enduring a nightmare as they attempt to part ways. Sadly the nightmare tends to be the scorned ex-wife. (Being a female and having the title of wife before, it gives me no pleasure to point that out btw)  Now … not to say that the husbands can’t cause a great deal of pain, but from my experience it is the ex-wife that wants to “make him suffer” – be it financially … or because of his desire to move on with someone else (how dare he!) … or regarding the (what should be simple) logistics with the kids. And this, I just don’t get.

Over 20 years ago — right after I started to be a grown up in this world — I had a friend that experienced the same thing. Yep it was a guy friend and yep it was again the ex-wife that was trying her best to make his life miserable. I didn’t get it then, when I was single and ripe out of school, and I don’t get it today when I myself have two divorces almost to my name.

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Photo courtesy of Can Stock Photo

So this is my little plea on behalf of every divorcee that is going through hell in the process (men and women alike because I know there are men that can cause just as much suffering) … Please people … remember WHY you first fell in love with your spouse. Remember that greed never compensates for goodness. No amount of money will change the past, nor will it make you forget the reasons why the marriage experienced an epic fail. Remember your kids – that you made together — and want nothing but the brightest future for (free from the kind of misery you’re inflicting on your ex-partner right now).

Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you respond to it. —Lou Holtz

Instead — try to find the fairness in your heart that will bring you peace at night when you fall asleep. That will make your kids proud. That will allow your parents, siblings and friends to tell a short story about the separation … not a long one that brings the listener down and makes them feel distain for the ‘terrible ex’. Try to think about the mark you want to leave on this world – the one that makes it a better place, not casts you as the villain in your great autobiography.

For those divorcees out there that truly got the short end of the marriage stick … that experienced massive suffering at the doing of their former husband or wife … that did absolutely nothing wrong but are forced to walk away from the life they knew and loved and begin it all over again — I am genuinely sorry for everything bad that happened. I don’t wish unhappiness on anyone. But how we respond to what’s happened to us, is what really defines us. It isn’t having our ex pay all of the bills + attorney fees + alimony + child support (when custody is 50/50) + the insane demand of a portion of their future earnings, stock or 401K plan! It just isn’t.

Decide to be the bigger person. … Agree to the “right” decision from a standpoint that isn’t your own. Be fair. And above all – get the damn divorce and move on yourself. Regardless the circumstance, you have a new life ahead of you – begin that journey with a vengeance!!

canstockphoto14368205

Photo courtesy of Can Stock Photo

“The House That Built Me”

10 Thursday Apr 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Family, Life's Lessons, Love

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disappointment, family, farm, friends, growing up, inspiration, life lessons, love, Lyrics, Miranda Lambert, priceless, ski-dooing, snowmobiling, The House That Built Me

The other day I had the opportunity to introduce “The House That Built Me” by Miranda Lambert to two special people. This song has to be one of my top three songs ever. Actually, if I think about it, it is more like my favorite song of all time because of the deep connection I feel with it.

It’s not often that I introduce it to someone and they “get it”. Sadly, when I’ve been so excited about sharing this small insight into who I am with friends, loved ones or strangers, they have mostly displayed little enthusiasm or connection. And it can be SO discouraging – when you care about someone and you really want them to “get you” — and they respond with something like “it’s nice … so what’s for dinner?”.

So what’s the song about that I love it and make desperate attempts to have those in my life understand it (and me)?

Well, it has a very literal and figurative meaning for me. I like to think it was written from a real life experience and the writers were compelled to put pen to paper because of the difficult moment they were going through. If they didn’t – well they at least described my life pretty well. Since we all interpret words and experiences differently, I guess that’s the reason why it’s hard to find someone who understands it in the same way as I do. But the other night was surprisingly different. Finally, I shared it with someone who understood the piece inside of me that I really wanted them to “get”.

I grew up in a very small town that was extremely remote and hundreds of miles away from what most people my age had surrounding them. I was raised on a farm in Northern Alberta and “The House That Built Me” was literally the house that my father built and we lived in growing up on the farm. But the story isn’t as much about the physical house — it is more so about all that surrounded the house that played an instrumental role in who I have become as a person. Turns out this small remote farming town, with a Latitude of 58°N and a Longitude of 117°W, and a population of around 1,200 at the time, and winter temperatures often in the -30 to -40° Celsius, well it turns out … it had to lot to offer.

Looking back – I’m extremely grateful for my childhood – and especially the experience that the farm provided me. (I’d be remiss if I gave all of the credit to the farm and not to my wonderful parents — who always provided a loving, safe and thankfully, a very humble upbringing). But I have some great and unique memories from my childhood — watching calves being born and life created in an instant, Easter Egg hunts amongst the bales at the cow yard, going ski-dooing until our face was so frozen that you had to give in and go into the house to warm up, learning how to drive by the age of 11 and being able to take dinner to my dad {by.myself.I’ll.add} while he was harvesting late into the evening, and oh all of the fun times keeping myself entertained with a simple mud puddle. These life experiences, turned values, were (as I now know), priceless.

BUT it was not without some challenges. And the day I moved away … I was so happy and I vowed silently to my 15 year old self that I would never – ever – EVER – return to the town. You remember how traumatic life can be as a teenager, right?

Over the years I have, of course, matured and in addition to moving far away, I have been fortunate to have opportunities that have expanded my mind and way of thinking. And it has made me more appreciative for all of the challenges and disappointments along the way. I look back and it’s certainly not the past that I would have wanted to write about … but alas, it is the one that is being written.

So ever since I heard “The House that Built Me”, it’s been the comfort that I’ve needed to get past the brokenness … the failed marriages … the feelings of being alone (even when self-imposed) … the separation that comes from leaving family and having friends walk away …. and the severe disappointment knowing that all that I might have wanted in my life, might never come to fruition.

The lyrics read “You leave home and you move on and you do the best you can … I got lost in this old world and forgot who I am” has been so true for me. In general we let too many people, things and situations re-define us and shift our way of thinking that we forget about how strong we are … and how sometimes, what or where we are in life, is a result of doing our best and being determined to not give up – regardless how disruptive the path has been. And sometimes, we need to embrace the wonderful things that are right in front of us, without questioning or worrying so much about timing or right versus wrong, or what others might say.

I went back to this town a few years back. I did it with my Dad and got to hear story after story about life on the farm and his recollection of life back then … and that experience in-and-of-itself, was beyond amazing. Much had, of course, changed in 25 years but some things really didn’t. And there were friends and families there that I used to go to school with – ride the bus with – build ice sculptures with – and spend my time with from the age of zero until 15. And that was pretty cool.

We don’t get to write our story before it happens. Sometimes life is quite frankly unfair. People disappoint us and delight us at the most inopportune times. And we survive. We forgive. Or we move on and forget. Hopefully — when you remember back to the house that built you — and you look to the house that you live in today — you see some resemblance and can find appreciation and strength in the person you’ve become and the small mark you’ll leave on this world.

Oh, and for those two special people that heard the song and appreciated the lyrics … thank you – for seeing beyond the words, and into the house.

The house where I grew up. Albeit it looks a little different now.

The house where I grew up. August 2012. 

The House That Built Me Lyrics

I know they say, you can’t go home again
. Well, I just had to come back one last time
. And Ma’am, I know, you don’t know me from Adam
. But these hand prints on the front steps are mine.

Up those stairs, in that little back bedroom, is where I did my homework and I learned to play guitar. 
And I bet you didn’t know under that live oak
, my favorite dog is buried in the yard.

I thought if I could touch this place or feel it
, this brokenness inside me might start healing. 
Out here it’s like I’m someone else
I thought that maybe I could find myself.

If I could just come in, I swear I’ll leave
. Won’t take nothing but a memory. 
From the house that built me.

Mama cut out pictures of houses for years. 
From “Better Homes and Garden” magazine. 
Plans were drawn and concrete poured
 and nail by nail and board by board
, Daddy gave life to mama’s dream.

I thought if I could touch this place or feel it, this brokenness inside me might start healing
. Out here it’s like I’m someone else 
I thought that maybe I could find myself.

If I could just come in, I swear I’ll leave
. Won’t take nothing but a memory
From the house that built me.

You leave home, you move on 
and you do the best you can. 
I got lost in this whole world aAnd forgot who I am

I thought if I could touch this place or feel it
, this brokenness inside me might start healing
. Out here it’s like I’m someone else
I thought that maybe I could find myself. If I could walk around, I swear I’ll leave.

Holding nothing but a memory
, from the house that built me.

Watch The House That Built Me Video

 

 

Favorite Traditions

18 Tuesday Mar 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Family, Inspiration

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Tags

family, holidays, love, st. patrick's day, traditions

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

I admit, it’s not exactly the kind of day that encourages a long list of traditions (other than maybe wearing green and drinking beer – which are of course, great traditions), but it reminded me how fun having traditions are and I wanted to inspire my readers to share their favorites or start their own.

I myself do not have a lot of traditions but it’s been on my New Year’s Resolution list for some time. Sort of nerdy I know but “Start New Traditions” is, IMO, a very good resolution. Why? Because the tradition doesn’t have to be big – it can be ambiguous so I can make it whatever I want – and it lives on year after year. So it’s like the gift that keeps on giving!

A dear friend of mine has LOADS of traditions … events with grade school friends, college friends, law school buddies, people he met when he lived abroad, or clubs he’s associated with now. It seems like every time we have lunch I learn about yet another tradition or hear great stories about the ones that keep going (reminds me of the famous Ever Ready Bunny – his traditions keep going … and going).

ebunny

 

Side note – cute image huh?! 🙂 Amazing what you can find on Google!

So be it a new tradition to go along with a holiday, a birthday, a milestone, or the ones I love the most … for no reason at all … I encourage you to think about adding a new tradition to your life. It could be “Friday Night Pizza and Laundry” … just make sure it makes you smile inside and feel good about keeping the tradition going.

As for the new tradition I said I would start back on February 14th …. I’m reminding you to give yourself (and others) some love. Because none of us know how long we will be here, and when we see news stories such as the Malaysia Flight 370 … we should all take a moment to kiss our parents, hug our children and find quiet moments to love ourselves.

My thoughts go out to the families of those on Flight 370. May we learn the truth very soon about what happened to the 239 passengers and crew on the flight.

MALAYSIA-CHINA-VIETNAM-MALAYSIAAIRLINES-TRANSPORT-ACCIDENT

You Never Know

06 Thursday Feb 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Business, Family, Inspiration

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conference, friends, giving back, startup grind, unconference, VC

It’s hard to know what the outcome will be of anything you do. You could wake up super excited for no reason at all and have the best day of your life … or it could be the worst day without rhyme or reason.  On any given day we have no idea what will happen – who we will meet – what events will occur … or if we will make a meaningful impact on someone or something through the course of the day. And that should be something that we all embrace versus fear. Easier said than done, right?!  … I know!

The conference that I just attended was unlike any other conference for one small but critical reason – the founder made the simple act of giving back to other attendees a core part of how everyone interacted. Instead of the “Hi I am so-and-so and I do such-and-such … what about you?” … and then the “boring, exactly-the-same-response” in return type of dialogue … the conversations went like this “Tell me your story …. how can I help you?”. And that simple question changed the landscape of the entire event.

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Instead of putting your head down and walking past people, everyone looked you in the eye and said hello – and then stopped – and a meaningful conversation followed. Crazy, right?!

Now, not all connections will bring life-stopping change to the world, but I have to say that out of everyone that I met in 2.5 days, probably a solid 80% provided me with something of value. Such as ….

– I met a VC that is now trying to help connect me to the right company to find a job — thank you Dave!! You’re amazing!

– I met a fellow Canadian who is looking for some running routes around the city, to which I would be more than happy to share my favorite spots with Nathan (coming soon via LinkedIn my friend)

– I met Pete (who recognized me from my Twitter profile because I re-tweeted him the day before) who is originally from London and is now living in Whistler doing something really neat with 360 degree video … was introduced to that same VC mentioned above and who knows where that will lead! Good luck Pete! Not to mention that I now know someone who lives in Whistler! ha ha

– I got to interact with loads of young, spirited, bright-eyed 20-something year olds that have the ideas and enthusiasm to one day be ON the stage at these events in a few years — so I will be able to say “remember when we met and we laughed so hard at the whatchamacallit” — Girolama, what fun!! I look forward to your return trip in March!

… My point is that while we wake up and we go about our day with either hope or perhaps on some days, let’s admit it, a little despair … we never (ever) really know where the day will take us. We have to be open to all of the possibilities. We surely won’t see or experience change by living in our typical box — keeping our head down as we pass the new hire at the water cooler or stranger in the line at Starbucks .. so try to take the “give something back” approach and look to each person you encounter today with the concept of helping him or her along their journey. You might be pleasantly surprised with where it will lead you.

And by the way .. you can apply this to your personal life and not just work. Weaving this concept into your daily life with those that mean the most to you will have profound effects on the relationships with each person in your inner circle.

A final shout out to Mia, Elissa, Adam (Dr. Love), Thomas, Girolama and Silke — thanks for a very fun evening. See you at Startup Grind 2015!

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