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Being Superwoman

Being Superwoman

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Day 11: If You Couldn’t Fail

11 Tuesday Dec 2018

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Uncategorized

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Last night I kicked off the 2nd Cohort in a program I launched earlier this year. It helps  Canadian women leaders build a relevant network in Silicon Valley and grow their business.

Now what is super cool about this is the fact that 40 companies applied and nine ended up joining me for 3.5 days in Silicon Valley.  Most didn’t even know me … Had no idea what the program was about!  But thankfully, through the network I’ve built, heard something that resonated and decided to take a leap of faith – and a significant amount of time out of their personal and startup life to join me.

Day two was a fabulous reminder of the seeds we plant and where things can grow to.

Having grown up on a farm, my father would go out in the spring and plant various kinds of seeds on many plots of land — all with the “hope” that the rain would come to water it, and the sun would bring it to life, and that enough time would pass before the snow would fall so he could harvest and not only enjoy the fruits of his labor, but quite literally be able to afford the next year for his family (which included me!).

A year ago I planted the seed of my initiative I call the Canadian Women’s Network. I designed it to support women in tech in Canada gain access to Silicon Valley to grow their business and drive economic value back to Canada.

I didn’t know if it would be successful. Heck, even though day 2 of program #2 kicked off great, I can’t be 100% sure of its future success.

But what I did witness is something coming to life and impacting people who otherwise might not have access to this kind of opportunity at this early stage in their company’s growth.

I hope to only grow this program and drive deeper impact into a world I care about very deeply.  What ultimately results from it all will, of course, be determined over time.

But it speaks volumes to listening to one’s inner intuition and sometimes simply starting.

You might not know where it is going to lead … Heck, I promise you that you won’t.  But if you can embrace the journey (as hard as the unknown is) … then I do believe you’ll go to bed with a smile on your face and a warmth in your heart that is unlike any job you had or gift you’ve been given.

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Fall 2018 Cohort, Canadian Women’s Network You ladies rock! #FutureWorldLeaders

Creating 2019

01 Saturday Dec 2018

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Uncategorized

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I LOVE this time of year …. when I get to dream about the year ahead.

list of resolutions on blackboard with three blank, numbered sticky notes

It happens without fail. I start to dream. I do more writing. I strategize all of the areas of my life that I want to change, improve, re-write. And it’s SO exciting!

And then …

Well, I won’t say I fall flat on my face come January … but … the goals are always very lofty and my time management skills could use some, um … transformation as we say in the tech world.

This morning as I was doing my daily (ish) writing (a win on my 2018 accomplishment list even if it’s daily-ish), and I was in need of inspiration. I’ve been loosely doing “Morning Pages“ which is the creation of Julia Cameron in the book The Artist’s Way.  But daily writing without a purpose can sometimes turn into pages of complaining about all that is wrong, or bothersome to me.  So I made a conscious decision when I returned to this practice to turn my morning pages into affirmations and things I need to do in order to accomplish my goals.

But still … I needed some new inspiration.

And I found it.  The concept was to write about all of your accomplishments for the year. The “headlines” if you will.  All the things you are proud of.  Signs of growth.  Mindset shifts.  Any ‘Aha’ moments or moments clarity.  Great people you connected with and started a new friendship, or maybe a person or company you are doing a partnership with. A new client – or renewals of old.  From the small ‘wins’ to the larger accomplishments.

And that was perfect for me. It hit the spot for my morning pages.

But then I had an idea …. I thought since one of my goals this year (and will be into next year) is more writing, why don’t I use my Being Superwoman blog to create daily writing topics that I can use for inspiration each day.  It will force me to search for creativity and I can share with my albeit, few, but mighty followers.

Hence, the title “Creating 2019” for this blog.

Yesterday I sat across the aisle from old colleague on a flight back to SFO. When we worked together he used to push me way outside of my comfort zone, and he always had some good lessons or tips to pass along (whether he knew he was doing it or not).  As we were talking, waiting to de-plane, he made a comment, and I can’t quite recall the exact words, but something like “If it’s not your strength, turn it into your feature”.  I wondered why the universe brought him into my world on that morning and now as I create this plan for my writing in 2019, I realize it was for that lesson.

So I’m turning something that isn’t my strength, not only writing but consistency in writing, into my feature.

Today is December 1st. And that means it’s the first day of a new month. And it’s the first day of the last 31 days of the year. So it’s the first opportunity to begin a new habit that I can carry into 2019.

So if you’re up for it – my invitation to you is to take a few moments and write out all of your accomplishments for the year. Or you can do a smaller time period. Or a larger one.  They can be personal or professional and they can be private for your eyes only, or you can share a few with friends and colleagues (or complete strangers though your various list of social channels).

What did you accomplish in your job or your company?

What are some health and wellness goals that you’re proud of?

What personal shifts happened that have put you in a different place today versus the beginning of the year.

And I’ll be back tomorrow with December 2nd’s daily writing topic of inspiration!

 

resolution list.jpg

 

Credit to today’s “list of accomplishments” also goes out to Heather M – who has long suggested this to me as a good practice to incorporate from time to time. Thank you Heather for the suggestion and being a great guide in my life over the years. 

 

 

Waiting for Me

11 Wednesday Jul 2018

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Inspiration, Life's Lessons, Love, Uncategorized

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

life lessons, love, truth

As I sit here, eyes heavy, tired — with a plan to be in dreamland about 30 minutes ago, I am instead honoring a different commitment to myself, and that is to write about things that move me in that moment.

As an entrepreneur (which in-and-of-itself is not so easy of a definition for me to write), I am constantly figuring out how to build my business. How to ‘scale’. What is the right product or service offering. Which price point makes sense, for my clients but also for me.  How do I market myself (without a marketing team). How I promote my brand (without a media agency). Who do I align myself with when I have limited time and endless amazing opportunities.

It’s exhausting and exhilarating.  Scary and exciting.  Crazy good and full of obvious mistakes.

And all of this happens while, at the same time, I’m trying to just be ‘me’. And that might sound silly to some, but I think to many of my colleagues and friends going through a similar journey but with a different objective, it truly will resonate. Because sometimes the version that we have of ourselves and our capabilities are clouded with fear and doubt, contradiction and denial, impatience and lack of self confidence.

Yet. We truly only have two options:

1.  Give up. Accept the unknown and never get to the end because we fear the worst.

or

2.  Forge on. Up the hill. Across the chasm. Through the potential shame, embarrassment and fear of ridicule should we fail … Should we not meet our expectation. Should we accomplish less than what we set out to achieve.

And if we choose the latter .. then we must accept our flaws.  Embrace our individual ‘features’.  Live in permanent Beta.  Trust that all roads lead us to a better place if we’re determined to get there.

I don’t know about you, but sometimes I am tired of waiting for me.  Especially when I am right here, and am the.only.thing standing in my own way.

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Photo by Thomas Tucker on Unsplash

Author’s personal note:

To my friend whom I adore and have all the patience in the world for — I don’t know what the future holds but I know that you are holding it in your hands.  I can’t wait until you release and see yourself as I see you and as I know the world is waiting to embrace.  

Can I have a minute?

19 Tuesday Jun 2018

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Business, Family, Health & Exercise, Life's Lessons, stress, Uncategorized

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I know I’m preaching to the choir when I say …

Dear Universe,

Could I just have a minute?

And I probably won’t get much argument that Life  … is … well … really hard some days! And it often feels like ‘some days’ turns into ‘most days’.

Regardless of what we’re going through, it feels like it’s the biggest thing in the world. Because … it is — at least it is for us, in that moment.

Sitting on the opposite side of the conversation we can smile and say a kind thing — give unwavering encouragement — and really believe that it’s going to work out for the person.  But —- have them turn around and say that our world is equally going to turn out OK .. well, that’s a little harder to believe.

And that’s when I want to scream out to the Universe …

Could. I. Just. Have. A. Minute.

A minute to collect my thoughts …

A minute to feel like it’s not an uphill climb …

A minute to feel sunshine on my face without a care in the world …

A minute to reach into my soul and find that ounce of hope and belief that will carry me through the next valley …

A minute to breathe without the pressure of being busy, striving, achieving, accomplishing  …

Just. A. Minute ….

… where the Universe stops with me. Gives me a little nod. Cracks a smile. And makes the most vulnerable version of myself believe — yes, it is going to be okay.

Because then … it feels just a little easier to go back to my world of beautiful chaos — back to the high bar and expectations I set for myself — back to the work stress that I, for some reason, crave — and back to the family concerns that make me realize that my own mortality deserves more respect.

#DeepBreathe #Grateful #AlwaysLearning #RelentlessForwardMotion

 

 

Why I love the CMAs

05 Thursday Nov 2015

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Uncategorized

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Tags

ACM, american country music awards, CMA, country music, country music award, passion, sisters

For years now (actually it’s been, like, almost two decades!!) I’ve had a special love for the country music award shows. I grab a bottle of wine and I turn on the TV and I just sit. And listen.

I had a friend I used to watch the CMA and ACM awards with … and we’d watch it a year after they aired (obviously, a big “thank goodness for the dawn of the DVR”!!). Other years I would watch well within the annual time period (my guess is that those were the “boring years” – LOL) … And then there have been nights like tonight when, I’m watching it live.

Over the year’s I’ve watched the shows with friends that enjoy the music as deeply as I do … and then other times I’ve tried to share my passion with those that feigned interest (yeah, not so much). But dare I commit that I’ve almost always had a text message convo with my sister, who, without a doubt, loves the music as much as I do (thank goodness or I’m not sure how the sisterhood would continue – j/k).

Every year it’s different. And that is what makes it so special.

Tonight as I sat, with my glass of wine, for a moment I thought – wouldn’t it be nice to enjoy the night with someone special?  … You know, like the opposite sex special. Someone with whom I could really share my passion with … someone that enjoyed the music as much as I  .. someone who “got” me. And then I thought – maybe not.

Because sometimes having “someone” beside you isn’t that fulfilling. Actually, mostly, it’s about the opposite of fulfilling.  Finding that “right” person has so far eluded me, even though I “think” I know what it looks like.  I am in awe of the friends in my life that have found their “person” … like Fiona and John …. Kate and Mark …. Jodee and Brent. Now, I don’t know if they like the same music or where they “fit” … but they definitely have a fit that I know works for them.

CMA award night 2015{sorry I have to interrupt this little blog post to say that it’s super crazy when the CMAs say they are respecting female artists in one breath, and then they bring on Miss America and the Sports Illustrated 2015 cover model !!! … in low cut tops … short (like beyond short!) skirts .. and dresses with a slit up to their waist!! Seriously – is that what “respect for women” looks like in America?  Yep .. apparently so. #Sad}

Back to regularly scheduled programming – sorry for that rant.

And, … with that .. it’s a wrap. I’m still sitting here with my glass (okay, maybe now it’s a bottle) of wine … breathing in my passion of country music … enjoying life just as it is.  Because even though Meredith on Grey’s Anatomy made us all want “that person”  … sometimes we have to just be OK with a bottle of wine and the CMAs.

Reba

Thanks for always being there on the side of the CMAs Trish. xox

{We Meet} Family

17 Monday Aug 2015

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Uncategorized

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Tags

auncle, aunt, busy schedules, cousin, family, father, grandparents, happiness, love, memories, mother, reunion, sister, tradition, weekends

Family.

It describes our history … where we are from … why we are how we are … what “features” we have.

It defines us today … those whom we’ve chosen to live with … grow with … start our own family with.

And it brings us pause when we think about the future … who will be with us … for how long … and how our own world will look as the years ahead turn into our reality.

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And no matter how old we are … we all have stories to tell about our families. Some good stories. Some sad ones. Others that make us laugh out loud. And some that we really want to forget.  Family is sort of a universal topic because we all have one or two … and if you’re lucky, you’ll have family under various definitions of the word.

But there is no denying it … family is family, period. And sometimes, it is up to us to make those relationships what we want them to be.

Twice this month I got to spend some time with my family and my extended family: Aunts. Uncles. Cousins. Second cousins. Old. Young. … Sometimes the conversation was easy.  Other times you had to work at it. Sometimes the topic was deep and introspective. Other times it was surface level, like you just ran into an acquaintance at the grocery store.  But you know, I think that is OK. Family is like a kaleidoscope, or sometimes, maybe like the Northern Lights. Always changing. Beautiful.

So hard to capture but managed to get this shot of our magical Northern Lights. So glad we all decided to look up last night!

So hard to capture, but I managed to get this shot of our magical Northern Lights. So glad we all decided to look up last night!

So for just a moment, I’m going to talk about my family. Because I’m so proud of them. So glad I have them … So happy I get to call them my own.

I think what I like most is that my family is interested in my life. I don’t live close so I miss the chance to meet up for the little things and experience some of the big things … Hold little babies in your own arms … watch them grow into toddlers … and then into little human beings … Watch romances begin … turn into wedding bliss … and sometimes, be there when life doesn’t turn out as planned.

I remember having family reunions when I was little.  My parents were younger than I am today when they started.  But some of them stopped … or there was a longer break between them … or you were left in charge of organizing the next one and you didn’t get around to it (one of my life’s regrets).  But if I hadn’t had those early year experiences, I’m not sure I would be so keen to go to one nowadays.

But two weeks ago I went to a reunion on my mom’s side, which is held every two years. Sadly, I haven’t attended one previously. I’m not even sure when they started! But I know I haven’t attended one since moving away 16 years ago. Usually I’m the person that says I will drive for endless hours or across endless miles to see someone that is important to me .. but I missed these in the past. And after joining this one, you can bet I’ll have the future ones on my calendar for the years ahead.

And this past weekend we held our third annual “We Meet” family reunion on my dad’s side. It started just three years ago after we lost my aunt suddenly and both of my grandparents within one year.  All of grandparents lived LONG and healthy lives and I can only hope I have their genes! But they were here on this earth and with us for a long, long time and they taught us all so much that when we gather together, we can’t help but tell story after story about them. And you realize just how much their wisdom and their traditions have shaped all of our lives and how, now, the responsibility is on us.

So now WE are the ones that must take the torch and carry on with the family reunion tradition. To organize, and attend, and bring together the families. So cousins can get to know each other … gain invaluable memories that will no doubt, include a simpler time, … so we all remember how important it is to take a moment to listen, laugh and learn about what is happening in the lives of our important family members. …. The good news. The sad news. The laugh out loud stories from the past. The smiles when we first see each other. And the precious hugs we give to each family member until the next time {we meet}.

These weekends are not always convenient.  They are inevitably with conflicting calendars and invitations elsewhere … especially in today’s crazy busy world. They are also time consuming. A five-hour drive each way for most families  … and over eight hours for another family.  But, no one complains because we are all there because we choose to be. And that in-and-of-itself, is amazing. Because when you think about all of the pressures we have — you realize that everyone showed up was because it was their choice. And for that – I know how lucky I am and how special my family is.

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Little cousin M. Sitting around the campfire that just the evening before, had everyone laughing and sharing stories. With a tear in her precious little eye and I know a hole in her heart, she didn’t want the weekend to end. And neither did I. Until next time I see you little miss M. 

So until next year.

Will the same people come? Will more? I can’t wait to see the kids one year older! I can’t wait to catch up with some family members that I really just got to know this summer. I can’t wait to spend five hours in the car with my mom, dad and sister … really.  I can’t wait to hear about what everyone has been up to. To laugh together. To cry if needed. And to give everyone a big smile and say – hey there family, I’ve missed you .. how are you?  And to embrace each and every one of them as we say our good-byes with the best hug I can give, until {we meet} again.

Too Good to be True?

07 Friday Nov 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Uncategorized

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Have you ever wondered, is this too good to be true?  Like, am I dreaming – why doesn’t the whole world know about this!! (insert person, place or thing here).  And have you ever questioned what might be wrong with YOU because you seem to have stumbled upon gold and the rest of the world hasn’t clued in yet?  Well I know others that question the same thing.

I’m here to tell you that you’re not crazy.  I don’t believe in the “too good to be true” model because I DO believe in unicorns.  (So now you’re like – OK, that makes zero sense!) … But it is true!  Because I DO believe in the “happy ever afters” … it’s just that it’s “after” disagreements, challenges and sometimes huge misalignments … but, news flash – that is life!

Therefore I’m going to tell you why you should believe in unicorns too.

i believe in unicorns

Simply put, because the alternative sucks!!  I mean, believe in happiness or dwell in loneliness — or worse — mediocrity!! (see previous blog post on that subject!) .. I say, nope, no thank you!  I choose happiness. I choose “too good to be true”.  Because we are what we believe.

How many times have you read “you are what you think”?  If you haven’t then you need to read more because it’s out there in the universe … we become our thoughts so we should think before we move about this world too freely.

I’m not saying that life doesn’t suck.  It can.  Sometimes it really does.  We’ve all be there and it’s.no.fun.at.all.  But to let it knock you down, well — we are smarter than that.  Regardless if it’s our current reality — we still should dream — and have hope — and make that wish — because that “perfect spot” between crazy and amazing, well it does exist.  One just has to believe …  in unicorns.

As I’ve said before, if you’re going to dream – dream big.  That big audacious thing (again, insert person, place or thing here) is out there and available to you.  Don’t question it too much.  Don’t over analyze it.  Don’t re-think it just because you can.  Instead, believe …. in unicorns.

One of my most recent loved quotes is “You are here to be swallowed up.”

So let the “too good to be true’s” swallow you up.  Let the thought of that take you to the place you have always dreamed about — the place that barely anyone knows exists except you —- the one that leaves you with a smile the moment it crosses your mind.  Because … unicorns, yep, they do exist.

You just need to believe.

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#crazyhotmatrix

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