• About
  • Contact

Being Superwoman

Being Superwoman

Tag Archives: running

Saturday Mornings

20 Saturday Dec 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Family, Health & Exercise

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Christmas, friends, running, saturday mornings, sleeping in, trails, utah

good_morning_wallpapers_free_download_good_morning_wishes_and_quotes_for_happy_morning_wallpapers

 

It’s 0830 and I have yet to get out of bed. Call it lazy. Call it boring. Call it un-productive, but today I call it perfect.

For the better part of nine months this year I woke up on the weekends with one of my most favorite things planned … to go for a run. I had to start from scratch last year as I was coming off an injury that turned into a surgery that got complicated by a great distraction … so it wasn’t always an early morning and a long run, but it was always the focus.

And then the training runs did get long … and the desire and need for new trails came up … and those were even a further drive away … which meant that sometimes me and my (amazing!!!) running gals would head out for 18 miles and oops, get lost and then run 24! Friends and family were very patient when we left by 0630 and got home in the very late afternoon. And then, yep, of course we’d all get up Sunday and go for another run (albeit not quite as far).

In the final two months of my training I was out of the door by zero dark hundred … running in the double digits … and enjoying the beautiful trails for hours. Sometimes with friends. Sometimes on my own. Often I would run with one or two for 10-ish miles and then someone else would join or replace the others so that I could get my long runs done without too much time on my own. My running friends are beyond awesome.

So today …. No long run. Actually, probably no run at all. Just the day in front of me for however I choose. And right now, as I type this post … I’m loving what is in front of me … a smile from spending two days with a new friend and enjoying a precious little girl … knowing my mom is home from her hospital visit and on her road to recovery … the thought of making perogies with my sister when I am home next week for the holidays (I’m certain to impress a boy with home-made perogies, right!?!) … and thinking about the canvas I’ll paint for my life in 2015 … I’ve never been to Utah. Perhaps it should make the list this year. I hear there is lots to do in Utah and I bet they have a few trails I would enjoy.

#TimeToGetUp!

The Footsteps of Superwoman

09 Saturday Aug 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Family, Life's Lessons, Love

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

blog, desperation, divorce, exploring, friends, happiness, inspiration, joy, marriage, mom, parent, running, step-daughter, step-mom, step-parent, struggles, superwoman, writing

When I came up with the title of this blog it was because at the time, I was playing the role of step-mom to a beautiful 10 year old girl, and it was the first time in my life that I got to experience being a parent. I quickly discovered a huge appreciation for every parent on the planet and especially those that were doing it alone. I was amazed how important it became for me to drop my work and ensure this girl learned her multiplication, completed her homework, adapted to the nuances of living here, and at the same time, met some new friends and started to experience all the beauty that surrounded us. While it wasn’t easy, because I’m pretty good at being a workaholic, there wasn’t ever any contest — without asking, the girl and her needs always won over (and happily so).

I kept the name of the blog even though by the time I starting writing, my circumstances had changed and (sadly for some reasons, and happily for others) I was faced with simply taking care of me again. With a little time I have learned that there is also something heroic about waking up and trying to figure out what I want. Did you know that it’s actually easier to wake up when you know the routine so perfectly, when you don’t have time to think? Simply wake the girl, prepare the lunch, make sure the girl gets up, do the first email check-in, ensure the homework’s packed, remind the girl we’re late, drive to school, be the friendly parent and say hello to the other busy moms and dads, hurry home, begin the day. With the absence of that purpose, it’s been WAY harder each morning — because now the purpose is me — and it has been a very long while since anyone took care of that girl.

“They say” the leading cause of divorce these days is marriage. Although I don’t know why, I do believe the statistic. 🙂 Something just seems to change when marriage is involved. Kids can play a big role, but even without children, many men and women loose themselves and struggle desperately to find their way back.

And then once we do separate and think, oh thank God I’m free from “that!”, we struggle to know who we are and what we want — and we spend oodles amounts of time and energy pushing away anything that looks remotely close to what we had in our past.

Right now I want to have it all. I want to be all of my many personalities and be all the ways that my heart tells me to be when I’m quiet enough to listen to it. I don’t want a box – certainly not the one that I’ve had before … but I do want some of the pieces that were in the box. Is it possible?  Of course it is … but it takes courage and relentless forward motion. Let’s hope I have both.

Because today I saw that little girl that inspired me to name this blog (amongst many other things that I’m sure will be the subject of future writings), and for those few hours, I was reminded what a real superwoman looks like. And that piece exists within me — that I know for sure, and it brings me joy when I think about it and her.  And I don’t want it to go away.

Tomorrow I get to be runner girl and wake up at 5:30 am to share a beautiful and challenging trail with some women I’m lucky to call my friends. I’ve desperately missed that, and them, and I always want to have this as my number one choice for a Saturday morning.

And then tomorrow night I’ll be just a girl out on the town with my best friend. I’ll wash the hours of sweat from my face and dirt from my toes and wear high heels or boots (cause it is San Francisco in the summer after all) and no one will know by looking at me the other sides that exist or that I started my day in a pair of trail shoes.

And the best part will be Sunday, when I get to be explorer girl and do something new with someone I am excited to get to know. Even though he’s only ready to see a few sides of me — that’s okay. We are all on our own path and the only thing important is to enjoy the path that we are on in that one moment.

Why can’t we be all of THAT in a marriage?

And if I thought I was on the wrong track, then the text from Alaska out of the blue as I started to write this blog, reminded me that I am not.

“and btw: your inner superwoman is right in front of you — there are a few occasions where she’s following YOUR footsteps”.

Wow. How can I not celebrate all of those pieces that make up the reason why I started this blog in the first place.

photo

Helping with the school book report … Priceless.

The Art of Being Alone

01 Friday Aug 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Life's Lessons

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

alone, concerts, crown and coke, dierks bentley, dining, friends, friendship, movies, running, shoreline, wine

At lunch today I had a conversation with someone that does a lot of traveling.  He’s fortunate that he’s built his career and life so that his work can blend seamlessly into his personal life.  And the crossover appears to be something that works. Not everyone can combine work and play. And not everyone wants to, that’s for sure.

But during our conversation the topic of traveling came up. And you see, I’m not a big traveler.  My excuse has been that I haven’t gone somewhere — with someone — or experienced that one moment where I caught “the bug”.  At least, not yet. When my friend asked why I didn’t travel (sorry Rob, classifying you as a friend already!) simply put, I told him that it’s probably because I haven’t really been asked much by friends, family or significant others. [Not to say no one has ever asked, or that I haven’t traveled, because they have, and I have … but generally speaking, I don’t travel much]  He asked why I didn’t travel alone then, and I didn’t have an answer.  Huh … I guess I really could.  Maybe I should. Yep, that is something I should consider. Probably something I should not just consider but actually do, because thinking about it will get me no where.

And then it got me thinking even more.   I DO do things alone and by myself.  I started out running by myself – lord knows how many miles I’ve logged with just my thoughts (yep, especially those days before the walkman turned iPod). But since I discovered a running group, truth be told, I log most of my miles with friends, and sometimes even strangers – thanks Mauve.  Especially the double digit runs, for which I might die of boredom otherwise. But I now prefer running with friends over running with myself nine times out of 10.  Could be because I’m actually that boring (don’t say it, because I am considering that very thought as I write!).

But wait – there is more!  I have eaten many a meals, especially while traveling for work, by myself.  I actually quite enjoy this – probably because I like the opportunity it brings to meet people.  The world is a blank canvas when I walk into a restaurant alone and it’s sort of a challenge to discover who will sit at the bar stool beside me.  So while I’m dining alone, I’m actually looking for entertainment and an experience. Maybe it doesn’t count?!?

I go to movies alone.  This is a good one … Because someone once told me, or I read it (eeks, it might have been an Anthony Robbins book, like 20 years ago), that going to a movie by yourself was empowering.  That is probably why I went. I wanted to feel empowered as a fresh out of school young woman looking for my way in the world.  I still go to movies by myself, and they are enjoyable. But movies are sort of a solo thing anyway, right?  You can’t talk throughout the movie.  If you’re with someone you like, then you can hold hands. If you’re with a really great girlfriend you can sneak in a bottle of wine and sit in the back row and at least smile to yourself knowing that you’re having a moment with a bestie that no one else in theatre will ever know about. Except for the cleaning crew when they discover the wine bottle as they clean up.  And if you’re with someone from Alaska, well, then that’s definitely one of the best ways to enjoy a movie without saying a thing. #best.movie.experience.ever

Tonight I went to a concert by myself.  I’ve done it before.  Saw the Dixie Chicks one year when I was home to visit my family.  Totally awesome concert but have to admit – a little different being there by yourself.  And of course I would run into someone I knew!! And you should have seen the look on their face when they asked “so who are you with?”.  ha ha.  But it didn’t stop me.  I went again a few years back to Miranda Lambert by myself.  Really wanted my Alaska friend to join me, but alas he was out of town.  Again, enjoyable, but it felt like something was missing.  And lastly, tonight, as I said, I went yet again by myself.

— Okay at this point, you might be wondering WHY am I going to so many concerts by myself.  Good question!  You see, the main reason is because I love country music and as it turns out, not many (like none) of my friends share in my enjoyment.  So it has gotten to the point where I don’t ask anyone to go with me.  I simply buy a ticket if I want to go, because I think that going with someone who doesn’t enjoy the music, might actually be worse than going to a concert by yourself.

yay_country_music-3201

But back to my story.  Shoreline had over 21,000 fans tonight that came out to see Dierks Bentley. Now that’s an interesting number.  21,000 people that live in the Bay Area that LOVE country music (men, women, old, young, HOT, not so hot at all, drunk, sober), you get the picture … but yet not one of those 21,000 people were one of my friends.  Why couldn’t just one be my best friend, no forget that, even just a casual acquaintance that I met randomly at a restaurant bar out for dinner one night – that I learned we shared a love for country music and that is the extent of our friendship – we go to concerts together!  BUT … Nope!  Not even someone like that.

It might sound like I’m complaining, or feeling sorry for myself, but I’m actually not.  I just learned that while one can love something a lot, I think in a lot of cases, it’s just way more enjoyable to do it with someone who can enjoy it with you.

My one exception is drinking.  And writing a blog.  While drinking is super fun with friends (jumping fences, skinny dipping, wine tastings – I should stop right there), right now I’m enjoying tremendously my Crown and Coke as I sit outside my apartment and write this blog.  Life is perfect in this moment, even if just one hour ago I felt alone in an amphitheatre with 21,000 people that all shared one of my favorite things to do.

So maybe it’s not about just the things that you love, but knowing the things you love to do with someone, and the things that you love to do without them.

It’s All About Community

22 Tuesday Jul 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Inspiration

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

book club, books, community, friends, neighborhood, neighbors, running

There are so many great ways to describe “community”.

Community could literally be the four square blocks around your home made up of people that share your same Zip Code (or Postal Code if you’re in Canada). And that community could be comprised 100% of people that you don’t know, never mind could rely on in a time of struggle or need.

Another community is your friends. Those that are there when you have good news to share, a complaint to sort through, or somewhere in-between based on the year, the day or let’s be honest, the boss that is making your current job miserable.

Sometimes communities form out of other communities – the group that gets together over a special event, a sport, a book club or perhaps something less common like, let’s say, a psychic reading, where you find some commonalities that make you feel connected.community heart

I think a goal should be to have as many communities as you can in your life – for all kinds of situations and events. I think a variety helps to provide perspective and an outside view which you might not have otherwise been able to see. Dare I say that actually hanging around the same community, all of the time, is not as healthy and certainly does not offer much by way of diversity.

Sometimes it is awesome to bring your one or two community groups together – because like I said, it offers diversity and a change of perspective. But sometimes I think it’s perfectly Ok to keep them somewhat separate if the tastes and talents are not aligned.

Recently I’ve had one community that I’ve re-developed and I am so excited to have the people reintroduced into my life. That community for me is my running community. The group of gals that for the most part meet me at 8am on a Saturday morning, endure my crazy stories while climbing hills and running through the woods (and I endure theirs), and then finish with a cup of coffee before we head out on our own merry way only to see each other again in exactly seven days — at the approximate same time, in the approximate same location, and to essentially repeat the same thing. But guess what. We ALL love it. We all come back. Even if we didn’t quite like the stories. Even if the hills were not nice to us and made us walk funny for days. Even if we felt outside of our comfort zone and pushing limits beyond our personal beliefs.

Now some might say, “Yeah but it’s about the running. You enjoy it because it’s about the running. It’s exercise so it doesn’t matter. Right?” Actually I’d say wrong, and my response would be that the running is actually second behind the community that comprises it.

Regardless what community you have or how it was built, or for what reason it exists … if it’s something that feeds you and lifts you up – I say it’s something you should be thankful for and remember is there for you when the world seems a little upside down. Or right side up! Celebrate with your community as much as you rely on it for support.

Thank you to the community around me. Not the apartment complex where I live where my direct neighbor won’t even say hello to me as we pass in the hallway. But the community that joins together to discuss a book that we all committed to reading (just because someone suggested it was a good idea). Or the friend that is outside my gym at 6am with a smile on her face and enthusiasm beyond my understanding to spend the next hour with me. And the family that I know, no matter what, is the best community that I will ever have.

If you’re stuck and can’t determine how or where to build your community, follow this one rule: Find people that make you not want to look at your phone. That’s a good starting point.

LOVE HANGING OUT WITH PEOPLE AND I DONT LOOK AT MY PHONE

50K (or 31.07 Miles) of Relentlessly Moving Forward

30 Thursday Jan 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Health & Exercise, Inspiration

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

50K, first marathon, learning to run, leukemia and lymphoma, lost souls ultra, marathons, running, team in training, ultra running, way too cool

I started Being Superwoman to inspire others to be their most audacious self — to dream big — and to find that inner hero who can help them accomplish anything they set their mind to do.

When I was about 25 yo a few friends that I worked at a construction company in Edmonton, Alberta, were going out for a run after work. This group would get together and run races on the weekends and have fabulous stories to tell Monday morning. Curiosity piqued my interest and so I decided I would try out this running thing … and wouldn’t you know it … I could barely run around my block!!

I didn’t let my first step limit me from continuing and so I kept up with the running and soon I was up to three miles … which is where I stayed for a good number of years. Always a three mile run. Never a fast run … and never any greater distance (or thought of anything greater). That was until my friend Dianna invited me to complete a marathon with Team in Training. Because I’m adventurous I signed up and completed my first marathon in December 2001. This marked the beginning of my passion for running.

I kept running … in the mornings at 5:30 am with my friend Jeanmarie to the bottom of the Golden Gate Bridge … on weekends at half marathons or 10Ks … and in the evenings at a track workout where I learned the real reason why I run (to drink beer afterwards!).

Then something happened. I stumbled upon people doing Ultra Marathons (which means any distance greater than a marathon – could be a 50K, 50 Miles, 100 Miles!) … and I was like “I am never doing that!!” …. Until, you guessed it, one day I got inspired by my friends at the Tuesday night track workout telling amazing stories of their weekend running adventures. So in 2010 I completed my first Ultra Marathon … the Way Too Cool 50K run in Cool, California … in 7 hours and 24 minutes! I told you I wasn’t a fast runner!

Last year I ended up with a new title “injured runner” and had surgery for a meniscus tear. I also had a whole bunch of other life changing events so 2013 turned into a year without running. I’ve missed it dearly — I’ve missed my friends and their stories, and I’ve missed being inspired. So I’m now a regular at the gym to rebuild some muscle strength, and I’m finally back on the trails to build up the mileage again. And yesterday on my 2-mile run I found myself smiling because I was back doing something that was so authentically me.

Oh and I also signed up for the Lost Soul Ultra (50K distance) in September of this year because after all, I like big audacious goals. And I need a goal to keep me pointed in the right direction.

What is your passion? And are you being bold enough? Audacious enough? Where might a run around your block take you??

IMG_8209

My 2-mile run … It doesn’t look like much, but it was everything!

Recent Posts

  • I am enough
  • Living Your Potential
  • Community
  • Chick Flicks
  • Day 14: Creating Success

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 3,109 other followers

Blog at WordPress.com.

Cancel